A BIBLE OF BLOKES AND SHEILAS

And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus. All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:
2 Timothy 3:15 & 16

Thy word is true from the beginning: and every one of thy righteous judgments endureth for ever.
Psalm 119:160

Here We Go Again!!!

A Bible Of Blokes And Sheilas

No more thous and these in uniquely version of the scriptures

By Nick Squires In Sydney

The New Zealand Herald, Monday, 26, 2003

Australians who struggle with some what obtuse language of the King James Bible now have their own vernacular version to turn to, complete with pretty Sheila’s, good blokes and dusty, down at heel pubs.

Called the Aussie Bible, (well bits of it anyway), it provides a uniquely Australian spin on the Virgin birth, Joseph, the Good Samaritan and other well known parables.

There is not a thee, thou or yea verily in sight. Jesus’ father, Joseph, becomes simply Joe, the Three Wise Men are The Wise Guys and the baby Christ sleeps in a feed trough instead of a manger. (The local pub was “full to busting”)

It is the work of a journalist and author Kel Richards, who drew inspiration from a cockney version of the Bible, and follows hard on the heels of a Surfer’s Bible, published last year by the AUSTRALIAN BIBLE Society. {capitals mine} It took Richards a year to translate large chunks of the Bible, including favourite bits from the gospels of Mark, Matthew, Luke and John, into “Strine”.

The Good Samaritan, in which Jesus tells the story of a man attacked by robbers who is ignored by a priest and Levite before being helped by a Samaritan, is translated into the sort of language found in any outside pub or city building site.

“A bunch of bushrangers attacked him, stole his dough, and left him as good as dead. A big wig from the temple happened to pass by, took one look at the bloke, crossed the road, and hurried off. Another official who was on the road that same day did the same. “Then a really ordinary bloke (a grubby old street sweeper you wouldn’t look twice at) passed by and felt sorry for him, so he used his first-aid kit to patch him up, and then put him on his old nag, took him to the nearest pub and took care of him.” The Aussie Bible has been given the Anglican Church’s official blessing and includes a foreword by the Archbishop of Sydney, Peter Jensen, as well as the deputy Prime Minister, John Anderson.

Due to be published in August by the Bible society of New South Wales, it will have an initial print run of 30,000.

In a country with steadily falling church attendance, Richards said he wanted to make the Bible accessible to all Australians. The Bible Society’s Martin Johnson said the vernacular version was not to be disrespectful.

It’s slightly cheeky, I suppose, but certainly not meant to be irreverent, “It’s done with a large amount of care.”

So you see, this must be progress according to the Modern Versions folks. Of course we know better. I am sure many of us out there can write a “bible” in our own vernacular if we want to and no one can prove that it is not God’s preserved “message” too according to these folks argument! Perhaps I should write the Chinese Version on the story of the Good Samaritan. Maybe the poor man was brought to a Chinese Tea House in Chinatown for some “tim-sums” and a cup of refreshing Chinese tea to aid in his recovery from the beating he received. Don’t you think this version of the story is more palatable for the highly sanctified, doubly separated godly defenders of the modern versions crowd? Moreover, I can still make some quick bucks out of these Laodicean Christians during our days and age who believe we should be all things to all men where we can cope and share everything except Bible truths!